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Friday, September 25, 2015

I AM STILL ALIVE (!)



I am strangely still alive! It is somewhat mysterious and the mystery is yet to be found out. How can a man remain alive after his mind setup being shattered on encountering the present happenings, totally unbecoming to his own temperament and liking? I have all along tried to live with my own identity strikingly different from others. I am always reluctant to live with blind conformity to existing customs and practice because to go for critical analysis of every happening is my nature and I cannot avoid it. The present ongoing is creating sufficient contradictions and confusions in my mind. Naturally I cannot take those happening as granted without citing any debate or reservation. Conceptual concurrence propels us to live in mental peace. The present situation is always challenging the philosophy of my life, my attitude to life and I shall be advised to accommodate all those nonsense without challenging. How can that be? I can never dispose of the purity of my own soul at the exchange of any. Those who do this as a way of compromise I would like to remain at poles asunder from them.
One may raise a question what is the basic element of my contradiction. Each and every man creates his own world and that is his living abode. None can survive in absolute vacuum because there is no capital as such what can fuel his spirit to be alive. If we extend our vision up to any length it is sure to be discovered that the world is now the messy litter-bin of waste and unwanted thinking. These trash thinking and concepts wound me much and I am pained because of our moral degeneration. Blood strain is oozing out from the pricking wounds of conscience. It is an irony to quote that even our conscience sometimes forgets to lodge requisite protest against social ills and evils. We expose our protest in different forms and techniques since our birth. It is our birth right. If situation compels us to eliminate that spirit with an execution of force it is beyond doubt a gross ignominy. What is the use of such living as a puppet? It is deliberate humiliation to our identity.
Why do such changes take place? It needs a perfect clarification. No positive explanation can be achieved if we do not encourage a debate on the issue moral degradation. Sometimes I feel that brain cells of ours are becoming defunct and we are becoming the victims of misconception and misunderstanding. Environments influences us much to form an opinion on the ground of reality. But a decomposing environment acts reverse. It spoils our faculty developments with viral contamination of all evils. It ensures our mental death. A man being mentally dead can never produce any good for the society. What is the sense of living as a fossil? I will be incapable of generating anything innovative or creative because of the death of my good senses and feelings and I will remain alive. It is the wrong interpretation of life. I can never assimilate the unfortunate death of creative life because it exposes the charm of our life.
I am really tired of fighting with me. None can survive fighting with inevitability. It is the case of mine now. The bankruptcy in my life is the truth in every walk. I hate the word compromise. My spine has become a non-flexible bow out of series of compromise. It is duplicity and I have a strong reservation to this particular word. Both ways acting stands as poison to my life. I always want to live keeping my spine straight without any flow cold blood through my spine. I become frustrated if anything stands reverse to this concept. That is happening overruling my contradiction or reservation. Then how can I survive? If I want to live I must have to change the situation with all out assistance from others whose brain cells are active and who can think in robust optimism. We can hardly live pledging our identity and philosophy to the custody of miscreants. It is our fundamental duty to change the situation so that we can breathe in fresh air.                  

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